The stars impart their weekly dose of wisdom for you lost souls.This week features the horoscope predictions of a guest astrologer, the noted Jugi Kinnunen. The difference between him and BTSB’s normal astrologer, you ask? Same sky, different astrologer.
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Aries March 21 – April 19 I’m not Fred Flintstone but I sure can make your bed rock! |
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Taurus April 20 - May 20 I wonder what you look like when I’m naked. |
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Gemini May 21 - June 21 Can I have a picture of you? I wanna show Santa what I want for Christmas. |
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Cancer June 22 - July 23 If beauty was a drop of milk, you’d be a gigantic cow. |
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Leo July 24 - August 22 My name is (insert your name), remember that because you’ll be screaming it all night long. |
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Virgo August 23 – September 22 Can you help me find my puppy? I think it went to that sleazy hotel room. Yes, follow me. |
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Libra September 23 – October 23 A leprachan gave me a choice, I could have a perfect memory or I could be a perfect lover. I don’t really remember what happened next… |
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Scorpio October 24 – November 21 If I could rearrange the alphabet I would put U and I together. |
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Sagittarius November 22 – December 21 I’m new in town. Can I have directions to your house. |
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Capricorn December 22 – January 19 Are you Jamaican? No, why? I figured you must be Jamaican, ‘coz Jamaican me crazy! |
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Aquarius January 20 – February 18 If it’s true that we are what we eat, then I could be you in the morning. |
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Pisces February 19 – March 20 The word of the day is legs. Lets go to my place and spread the words. |
[tags]horoscopes, march[/tags]